“Male Feminists” Out to Get Laid.

After a long ass day at work online ratcheting Kenyan misogynists, I log out, tired, but feeling all sorts of accomplished that out there somewhere in the beautiful Rift Valley or by the dusty shores of the Indian Ocean, a misogynist is uprooting them cactus thorns from his dumb ass.
I sleep soundly with the knowledge that all is well with the world.

You want to know who the fuck doesn’t sleep soundly? 

A feminist dating a woke misogynist! That’s who! 

Look, feminism and dating is quite a sensitive topic because you know you’re about to literally fuck around with your oppressor. So most feminists dismiss quite a lot of men/oppressors because we really ain’t about that doormat life.

But, picture this people on WordPress. A nigga(Y’all white people let me never hear you saying this word near me if you don’t want an ass whoopin) slides into your dm and he’s nice and shit. You, in true feminist fashion, tells him to fuck off because you’re now lowkey scared of every male cause the world got a whole lot of receipts on them and you really don’t want to be killed cause you told a dumb nigga “NO”

So you say,

He respects it. 


Oh shit. You try not to glorify a man for being decent but your internalised misogyny kicks in hard and extra.

 Your womanly instincts also promptly arrive because it truly looks like you may have on your hands an oppressor who understands CONSENT!

YOU slide into HIS dm. It’s about to get lit up in this motherfucker!

Fast forward to y’all’s meet and greet. He’s been so courteous in the DM, you told him you’re a feminist and he said he was one too and quoted freaking Alan Rickman and said women have it pretty rough and he’s all about making it better.

So you meet. He’s courteous in person. You interrogate him on life issues. What is consent. Has he ever catcalled a girl on the fucking streets? What does he say about his ex? Prostitution? Is his heterosexual privilege loud and toxic? What does he think about women in leadership?

His answers are juicy and you feel that hormone that generates feelings working overtime.

You say okay, let’s date. So you date.

Fast forward to 2 years of whirlwind sexcapades, online feminist ratcheting together and an online problematic comment that’s keeping you awake right now as other feminists are resting up for work tomorrow.

Did this nigga just post on social media a comment about how men should respect women because they are our sisters and daughters and mothers?

Did this nigga just tell a random woman to focus on books and shit and not make up and shit? Because #Sapiosexual?

Did this nigga just inject his male logic to another feminist online talking bout some feminists are emotional/irrational and are giving the cause a bad name?

Did this nigga just try to make a career out of feminism? He’ll be out on social media posting shit about how we ought to respect women and how women should be given more spaces and how Kenya should do better and he’ll get validation from everyone because he’s male. The fuck nigga, women been writing this shit for the longest time and ain’t nobody validating us.

This is what I’ll need you to do.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow. You gon learn.

So it’s tomorrow and you tell him to get the fuck out because you can’t afford to lose your sleep over a fake woke asshole. You have got priorities the fuck?

He says,

And you say,

And you fire up your computer to start the day. 


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s